June 27, 2011

Battered, beaten and bruised, physically, emotionally and spiritually; that was me not too long ago.  I have found a new freedom and a new happiness and to say the least I am holding onto this for dear life.  I cannot look back on my past, it's haunting and painful.  I want to breathe in this new life, this new me, this new love with every fragment of my being.  I inhale and taste life, I exhale and rid myself of slices of my past.  A new me is emerging and it's taken it's toll on the me I used to be.  That person is fading and allowing the new me to emerge.  I hold my pen upright and my thoughts aren't scrambled and senseless any more, they are full of inspiration and beauty, and I welcome them today, I am able to put into words, what I've feared for so long.  I have arrived, I am right where I need to be just for today.  I have longed for a place to belong and I now know where it is that I want to be, wrapped in the arms of God.  He is guiding me, he has given me hope for my future, he has been holding my hand all the while, and now I sense he may let go, but I know that he will always be there, to redirect when I fall off that beaten path so many others' have traveled to find their own happiness and their destiny.   Love is no longer that four-letter word I feared, it's real and genuine.  I love you, always...