January 10, 2013

It's shortly past midnight and for whatever reason, a calmness has come over me. I can't explain it nor do I want to question it. It's a strange sensation, nothing I can recall ever feeling. As I lie here going over conversation I can't help but smile, from the inside. It's almost foreign to me yet I'm going to allow myself to somewhat embrace it.I won't let it consume me because I'm afraid to. I actually love our talks, when they are just that. My eyes, I think, are opening. I know I'm not giving up, because there is this bond I feel and and to let go of it would be foolish on my part, so I am holding on...with all of my might. Hell! I'll use duct tape if I have to. I think I pushed FEAR away tonight, if only momentarily. I hate to admit it...I think I like that!