FINALLY! I finally
feel a sense of relief flowing over me… it’s been a long time coming, so I’m
going to try to hold onto this feeling with what’s left of the strength I
possess. I’ve been contemplating the
most sinister of acts against myself, even plotting my own internal revenge for
so long I thought that I had completely lost ALL hope of ever regaining
consciousness. I have been under a
spell, I know that I have and for some strange, unexplainable reason I feel
that it has been lifted. I can’t explain
it as I have just stated, it’s unexplainable.
It’s blowing my mind actually. I
know too however that this won’t last for very long, so I must take advantage
of it, while I can. I wish that I could
control my thoughts for they have controlled me for too long and I know the
outcome is grim if I allow them to completely take hold of me. I was terrified the past few weeks, so much
so that I was prepared, and I wasn’t the least bit afraid of where it was that
I had been heading. That statement right
there is horrifying. I know that I need
to get a grip and move forward. Where
might I go? I haven’t the slightest
idea, although I do know that anywhere has got to be better than where I
was. I close my eyes frequently
throughout the course of every day and the visions I see are morbid, or so they
have been. I want so much to change
those eerie images that invade my mind and be done with them; I just haven’t
that kind of strength left. We will see
what tomorrow brings, if tomorrow ever comes.
The day is already dragging and when it does, so do my thoughts…
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