November 10, 2011

Once again, I have allowed demons to take over my every thought, every action and reaction and in doing so lost a part of me I thought I had found.  I was mistaken.  I thought that I deserved so much more than I actually do, and perhaps I am throwing myself on that 'pity pot' so they call it, and if I am so fucking what!  I deserve to have all that my heart desires and then some.  Why is it that so many others' can have all they desire, but the ones' that work and strive for such, never seem to grasp any of that which is good, but just the opposite?  It seems more and more that I am unworthy of happiness.  I need to take my place in the circle of life and accept things just the way they are.  I can only hope that someday, one day things will be different and the struggles within and without myself will subside long enough for me to take a breathe and live life for a moment or two.