January 7, 2017

I suppose I am reaping what I have sewn. I am getting it paid forward and whatever other cliches fill in the gaps. I thought I could find happiness before I die however; it seems the wool has been pulled over my own eyes this time. What a complete ducking fool I must be to think that for one moment in time I deserved and sort of happiness.  I will delve into my own self pity now because I know I can depend on it. Always had hope that one day I just might be worthy enough.  Just when I thought it was safe to merely tread in the shallow depths of the water, I succumb to the evil that lay beneath it's surface. Unbeknownst to me the evil that lies low are those that I am familiar with. I should have know but I took a leap of 'faith' and looked the other way as I have always done and will probably always do. I should at this point in time just kick my own ass and rightfully so. I deserve that much!