December 10, 2013

The stage has been set, the curtains drawn, and now it's time for me to make my grand appearance, but wait! I am terrified. I feel myself trembling before stepping foot into the limelight. What has come over me? When will this subside? I feel myself becoming faint. My head is heavy as are my shoulders. I can barely hold myself up. I am about to lose my footing. What will I see when I regain consciousness? Will things finally make sense? I need some clarity. I need stability if I am to stand once again on my own two feet. I am so tired of falling. I am well aware that the darkness of the abyss lies beneath in anticipation of my arrival yet I haven't one ounce of energy left to recover myself from the depths, not this time. My eyes have grown heavy and my hands are weak. I fear what most fear. I see the gates of hell bursting open and the balls of fire emerging from raging well, it's deep inside me. The burning desire to move forward and the fear that holds me back. I don't have the ability to hold on.